Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Ne'er a love lost...

'Al' M. Wilson

Many say they don't do personals on their blogs, but if you know me well, you know that I say it like it is. I feel that's how we get to know each others lives...it makes it personal and we become sisters of the soul in a virtual world....then friendships grow no matter how far our lives are apart, we feel each others sorrow and joy.

Yesterday I was given the sad news that my ex-husband had passed unexpectedly from complications of pneumonia. He moved on Sunday evening, but the strange thing to me was, Scratchy and I took a drive down the country lanes Sunday morning, the ones Al and I used to drive all the time. I drove by the back of his house and the piece of property I still own next to his. I drove over the levee and looked at the Mighty Miss, just like we used to do, past the fields he used to deer hunt, always looking to see if his truck was in the field in front of the deer stand that my Grandson shot his first deer out of...was this my last drive with him...I like to think not... I'll think of him every time I drive those lanes.

For the last month, I've been dreaming of him, crazy, mixed up dreams of sadness, regret and relief. Some marriages go by the wayside, but the memories stay in our hearts, the good times and the bad...we just move on, but always remember.

Farewell dear friend
we are only separated
by dimensions
as love lingers
eternal
in hearts
we know not
what futures brings
we can only live
for today's journal
to write of paths past
yet knowing
they will cross
again and again
in fields of dreams
I'll walk these paths
again and again
writing memories
in the book
of love
I'll remember
again and again
your face


s.wilson

23 comments:

High Desert Diva said...

Oh Sharon. I'm so sorry.

Hugs

sassytrash said...

It has become so evident since I turned 50 that this is the most difficult journey of all--that of aging---and the hardest part is losing the people that are a part of us.
How awesome it is though, that they are always with us in our hearts and memories.
Thank you for sharing....I'm so sorry for your loss, and pray peace for you.

Wish on a Whisker said...

Truly a beautiful post. ~Mandy

donna baker said...

Sharon, I am truly sorry. I freak out when I dream things about people - especially recurring ones.

summersundays-jw said...

You're lucky to have the good memories and I find those are the ones that stay with you. I rarely think of the others. My thoughts are with you today and the emptiness you're feeling, but soon you'll notice that life starts filling that emptiness up -- slowly but surely. It's maybe never full but it's sure a heck of a lot better then what you're feeling today -- I remember. I'm sorry for your loss. Jan

Garden Antqs Vintage said...

What a sweet tribute to a man you once shared so many memories with. Sorry to read this Sharon, I hope your memories bring you comfort...

willow said...

This reached in, grabbed my heart, and gave it a squeeze.

Extra big hugs from me. ~xox

cconz said...

Wow sharon heart wreching post. Even though you parted ways, you were still connected. Sorry for you and pipers loss.

Jeanne said...

The husband of my youth, and father of my daughter, died three years ago, suddenly, like yours.

Thank you for this.

Sometimes I look at our little grandson (our daughter found out she was pregnant 3 days before Dad died, and hadn't told anyone yet) and I feel so...sad, angry, disappointed and then sad again...that he never got to know the little guy.

Who looks just a whole lot like his grandpa.

Lori R. said...

Sorry sorry dear mommy 1. Isn't that soooo wierd that the other day we were talking about that man... I just think your soul already knew of the passing. Hearts hurt and hearts heal and I know you truely hearted the good memories.... See ya soon....

misselaineous said...

Sharon..my thoughts & hugs are with you. Your post was so filled with emotion, I had to stop reading several times. You have such a way of expressing your true feelings, a way that many of us can only hope to achieve. Thank you for sharing your heart. *elaine*

The Attic said...

A touching post and I'd give you a hug if I could. Just a reminder we have to live each day to the fullest.
Hold on to those good memories Sharon.

trash talk said...

Sharon, I've been struggling all day after I read your post this morning to find just the right words to say. You and your sweet family have been in my thoughts all day and my heart is aching for yours. Ex or not...you shared a life and memories. Your words were beautiful and moving. I'll keep you close to my heart and in my prayers.
Debbie

Hey Harriet said...

I'm so very sorry Sharon.

You poem is a beautiful tribute to Al.

Tracy xo

simplyiowa said...

Sharon,
I am soo sorry...I kind of know what you are going through...I also know your depth...We think a lot alike... This, I know, will be a painful journey. My prayers are with you.
As time passes,the memories will be happier, I also believe we we all be together again someday, with wisdom, that will heal all wounds...
Barb C.

vikki said...

HI SHARON ~ SOO SORRY OF HEARING THIS... OUR TREASURES/MEMORIES LIE IN OUR ♥ HEARTS ~ GRATEFUL FOR THOSE... IT SOMETHING THAT CAN NOT BE TAKEN FROM US. I KNOW HOW U FEEL... MY THOUGHTS & PRAYERS ARE WITH YOU... TAKE CARE... LOVE WITH HUGS & BLESSINGS, VIKKI ♥ BEAUTIFUL POST/POEM M'DEAR FRIEND.

Utah Grammie said...

What a sweet tribute to this man who shared your life, even if briefly.

You have a connection -we all do with our ex's..we once felt love and even if that changes and becomes "different" - we once fell in love with these men of our youth..and maybe that's a part of the sadness..part of OUR history had died as well..healing and loving thoughts are being sent your way..

Golden West said...

So sorry for your loss.

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. You're in my prayers....Penny

Pam said...

I beautiful tribute to him and the times you both shared together. It touched my heart, thanks for sharing your thoughts. I am truly sorry for you loss...

Jane ... said...

My sincere sympathy to you! You've loved deeply, made treasured memories, and I pray for your comfort and peace in these days ahead. Your tribute is beautiful.

sue said...

Sharon, what a lovely, if heart-breaking post. Although you had split, you remain connected. I've never forgotten what my (younger) sister told me when I was disparaging my first love: he was a stepping-stone to who you are now. Even if we no longer are with them, or even no longer love them, they are a part of us. I, too, feel your soul knew something was different.

And thanks for sharing.

Anita said...

Ogh Sharon, I have been so busy and then I came back to read your blog and saw this....Having an ex myself, I can relate...hugs, dear friend.